Relay: Eau de Death–Evasive Zombie Survival
From the zombie lover to the necrophiliac (yes, we’re going there), there’s something about the decay (and animation) of expired human beings that, without a doubt, has captivated the masses. Flesh munchers (along with vamps, werewolves, fae and the sort) have wheedled their way into popular culture–with more reception than previously before.
But people start to wonder, question if zombies will someday be real. If you remember, there were a few incidents in the past of cannibalism, the most recent being the Florida man who almost chewed a kid’s face off. Since then, there’s been some fuss regarding the reanimated brain eaters. AMC’s hit series The Walking Dead hasn’t helped quell concerns of when the ol’ zombie apocalypse will occur.
Luckily for zombie apocalypse believers, Nebraskan chemist Raychelle Burks, PhD of Doane College has come up with a postmortem musk if you will, just in case a zombie outbreak does happen to take hold. In conjunction with the American Chemical Society, the researchers have been working on replicating the scent of early human decomposition.
The brew is predominately a mixture of two compounds–putrescine and cadaverine–and these highly-concentrated polyamines are emitted early in the human decay process. A touch of methanethiol (the scent responsible for bad breath, flatulants and other offensive sulfur-based scents) and the morbid mix is set to keep you protected from evil zombies.
Regarding the mass-production of these polyamines, apparently all of these chemical compounds can be cultivated from a modified E.coli bacteria, seeing it would have the amino groups necessary to produce the scent.
However, it should be noted that with a little research, the chemicals putrescine and cadaverine are quite lethal in large amounts. In a practical zombie survival setting, one would ask if constant application of this mixture would over time, decrease life expectancy due to constant exposure the mix. Little research has been put in to see if this mixture can be created organically from start to finish, however the cologne’s still in its infancy.
The scientists are still working on the formula, and it’s been noted that marketing a product like this would be like trying to sell salt to slugs. However if you’re in the market to protect yourself, or you just fancy that decaying flesh scent, it’d be in your interest to keep an eye on the “Eau de Death”.
Flora Gothica 